Buying Diapers
This joke comes from a new reader, Alan. Thanks for the laugh. Feel free to use the contact form to submit your favorite content to be featured on the site…
About three months after our first child was born, my wife had to leave town for a week for a business conference. I worked from home, so I was charged with taking care of our still young child, James. Nervously, she gave me lots of instructions, carefully written down for me. I carefully listened. Her final instruction was that we were almost out of diapers, so I was to go buy some at the store. She left.
All went very well. Her instructions were excellent. She returned at the end of the week. Arriving at the apartment she rushed into the baby’s room to pick up and hold her son.
When she picked up James, her eyes grew wide, her nose twitched and curled, and she quickly turned on me. “When did you last change his diaper?”
I calmly replied, “last Monday.” Her shriek was probably heard in Panguitch – and we live in New York. “What????”
“It’s okay,” I assured her. “I did just what you said. I went to the store and got these new diapers. They will save us a lot of time and money.”
“But you haven’t changed the baby for five days.”
With great confidence I showed her the box. “Yes, but look. These diapers are new and improved. See. It says these diapers are good for up to 18 pounds.”
She never allowed me to change James’ diapers after that time. Which, of course, is a win-win as far as I’m concerned.
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